Grand Celestial Do

It's a question that has riled many internet message boards: where does the best fighting style come from? Japan? China? Thailand? Korea? Brazil? Well, argue no more, internet flamers, or be anally probed: the best martial arts comes from outer space.

The website for Grand Celestial Do, a string of schools in Michigan, promises: "No games. No theories. Just no-nonsense, practical self-defense, and a new way of life. In 1976, George Salusbury was abducted by an UFO. Having spent 11 years on the aliens' planet, he acquired the knowledge of a revolutionary fighting system -- Grand Celestial Do : The Fighting Art of the Cosmos. His mission is to spread this new art to everyone on Earth. Are you ready for the future?"

Well... are you?